Jesus is playing on the religion channel

I'm trying to convince Phil to ask for a pony for channuka just to see what the response is.

It's finally starting to feel like the holidays. I think it really hit me when the song Christmas in Hollis by Run-D.M.C. came on shuffle on my ipod in the car while driving through snowy yonkers.

Soon I'll be christmas shopping and at a holiday party and then it's good old family time from there. who knows maybe I'll get another Staples gift card from my Aunt and Uncle who don't have any children but have a dog they push around in a baby carriage.

well
MERRY ALMOST CHRISTMAS!

telling the truth

truth number one: My sister gave me like a 40 mil of adderall at club mansion
truth number two: I just arrived home after a night of serious clubbing
truth number three: I cannot sleep and I smell like cigarettes.
truth number four: new york city is beautiful in the early morning.

I'm not sure how to understand the happenings of my life but I do know I haven't written in this in soooo long and its time to start up again. I met a man named Tito and I do not know where my sister and my cousin went once we got in the house because I ran upstairs so Judy (Mom) would not notice that I didn't get home till now, now. ?. Where was I? Political conversations ran at an all time high tonight and I don't know what to believe but all I know and all I was taught to know is that Obama is for change.

Nothing makes sense.

It all makes sense because it never made sense.

All I even wanted to do is create.

My ears are ringing like an orcestra at its highest note, like the surround sound system noise before a motion picture.

all
at
once.

And all i can say is that i met a man with the greatest haircut of all mankind
and I said this:
"your hair is amazing"
and he said this
" thank you, I'm going to tell my mom you said that."

Answer: I'm an art student

I feel like a lot of the questions people want to ask me can be answered with "I'm an art student"

Q: Why are your pants covered in paint? Is that a new style from Abercrombie?
A: No, I'm an art student.

Q: Why are you carrying a pie down com ave?
A: I'm an art student. (I had do a painting of it)

Q: Why is there a summer squash in your backpack?
A: I'm an art student.

Q: Who are you?
A: I'm an art student.

Q: Why are you carrying a lifesize cardboard sculpture down com ave?
A: I'm an art student.

Q: Why do you look like you haven't slept in days?
A: I'm an art student.

Q: Why aren't you smiling?
A: I'm an art student.

Q: What's on your face?
A: Art.

okay so that last one can't be answered the same way, but it is funny and true.

Becca's second cousin is Ralph Malph

Happy Days. 

bowls with straws attached are so very practical

For the past hour and a half I've been out with my bike aka the roadmaster aka the magic carpet. Phil just told me I talked to him last night and I don't remember at all.

 I went to CVS and the grocery store formally known as Shaws looking for string. Apparently string is a rare find in these parts. I just don't understand why an object so simple as that can't be found in local pharmacies and grocery stores. ALSO I ran into, or biked into, my friend Mike that used to go to BU and he is amazing. I'm so happy that happened. I WISH I COULD FIND STRING. 

PS. Last night I made out with a freshman and then had to call my friend just so she could tell me his name because I forgot. oops. 

I might as well have jumped in a pool with my clothes on

I got caught in a rainstorm today. A serious one. My contact almost fell out. 

And then Donna from craigs list sold the bike to someone else. 

so that's the kind of day I had. 

but i did just go rock climbing. 

 

here's a picture that I took at the zoo of a red panda: 

Lemonade Business

I was the first customer of a lemonade stand just a minute ago. It was adorable really, and the lemonade was homemade. I don't know why i decided to walk down this certain street because I could have gone a number of ways and when I turned the corner i was like shit i'm thirsty I forgot I had bodily needs. Then I saw the lemonade stand and was like oh ok perfection. fairly perfect day minus the minor hangover. I fell asleep with the lights on and in my underwear. nice. 

Now I have to wait for this woman named Donna to call me so I can see if I fit on her vintage bike. Hopefully the way things have been going today I will and then I'll ride it back. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

 I just typed with my fingers crossed. yep. 

Subject: My life

really?

"the maid thinks you're a brat"

Here's a photo of a mushroom that I took: 

So its a little out of focus but I thought it was cool so whatever. I showed it to my friend Owen, photography major at SUNY Poorchoice and he said "eh" 

This is something else owen said to me: 

owen: I have such a headache

Me: I'm sorry

Owen: Good. Cause It's your fault. I looked at a picture of you on facebook and I was like oh my god the pain.

Me: Thanks.

Owen: Sure.

Here's some bright red fungus: 

that was brighter in iphoto. 

So, I thought I would include Owen with pictures of fungus. 

Here's a picture of two bright yellow mushrooms I saw at boy scout camp: 

 still, brighter in iphoto. 

I was going to put owen's face on a mushroom to keep with the theme but this was funnier:  

                                                 

Okay I'm done. 

Recent news of my life

my oral surgeon stitched my cheek to my gums. 

  

the quality is crappy but whatever, I made this in my sketchbook.  

my mouth is bleeding

I got my wisdoms out and I could feel like the whole operation because apparently my body doesn't really react to anesthesia. My doctor was like oh you'll feel like you've had two or three drinks. yeah... because two or thee drinks doesn't really do anything to me unless its 3 full cups of vodka.

I need more pain killers.

Anyway, my doctor's office is filled with plush teeth, posters from the 80s and a couple of giant toothbrushes. I really love it.

On another note, why is Colbert's Ben & Jerry's ice cream flavor so hard to find?? I really want that.
Last time I got my bottom wisdom teeth off I cried because I wanted to watch the life aquatic and I didn't have it. This time, I think I'll be emotionally stable.

5 DAYS TILL PITTSBURGH!

pimple on your tongue = you're a liar

I'm at the pool, lifeguarding and I can feel my knees burning. I just took a break from reading Colbert's book. No one is swimming so I'm on my ipod. A man with a giant arm tat is talking on his cell phone and some elderly women are here too, probably chatting about the downfall of today's youth. I think the elderly shun technology because they don't feel like learning how to use it. I know they used to walk three miles to school in blistering blizzards but we have cars now, with four wheel drive. Old ladies are nice though. Damn, that mans tat is massive.

Now to what I was actually going to write about.

I had to pause for a min because people were swimming. A man named pat just told me to enjoy my college years because they go fast.

Okay now, what I wanted to say is that judy, my mom, (only sometimes I call her judy to her face like when I lose her in department stores) told me that when you get a pimple on your tongue it means you told a lie. Well, I have a pimple on my tongue its mildly uncomfortable and more of an inflamed taste bud than a pimple. So I guess I lied if I'm going to be superstious. I did actually, when john (dad) asked me if this little jewelery bag I had was for weed. He was like hey what's this for, weed? I said no of couse but I actually do keep my weed in another bag that is the same as the one he saw. Later, I actually did put my weed in it. I cannot tell a lie.

That was long and retarded

Ps I'm an asshole sometimes.
PPS when I'm lifeguarding I like to pretend I'm Harriet the spy, although I do hate that name

Who let me wear silver pants in the 90's?

"Who let me wear silver pants in the 90s?" I decided, is just too much for one title. Aesthetic chaos is better because I go to art school.

f'real.

How do I change this shit up? I used to have a livejournal but then I grew out of my angsty teen stage. A blog seemed fitter. anyway, I'm just going to write ridiculous things that happen in my life here since my life is super awkward and just bizarre. 

anyway, 

a fried Pb&J would be so delish right now.